Don't They Kick When You Do That? Vol. 2 By Dr. Gary Hoium

The cover of this book brought a huge smile to my face. Dr. Hoium looking toward the camera with his hand right to his shoulder, in a cow’s vagina. The look on his face, with a big smile, sent me a message that he enjoyed his job. I thought to myself, not everyone enjoys their job as much as this man, taking the risk that maybe the recipient of his probing is going to stand there every time and not react.

As a young boy visiting my grandparent’s farm in southeastern Ontario, I was able to watch firsthand many of the adventures that Dr. Hoium talks about in his novel. Spring calving, sick animals, castration, etc.

The stories, anywhere from five to ten pages long, made a quick and enjoyable read.

The chapter called Let Your Wife Do The Talking dealt more with maneuvering around a very strong-willed woman who did not appreciate the job of a veterinarian’s sacrifices and dedication to his job. This woman was harder to handle than the sick cow. The chapter’s ending made me want to applaud.

His description of calving in the middle of a prairie winter chilled me right to the bone, reading his description of this life-saving maneuver. Saving both the mother and the calf was always his number one priority, not his suffering from the chilling weather. Many times, he had to do a cesarean operation on a cow that was coming out rear end first. This was always a life-saving event for the animals.

I was educated by his writings, especially something I had not experienced on my grandparents’ farm. Having to re-insert a cow’s uterus after calving. Not something that happened a lot, but enough that it was a common call for him. Not once did a cow die because of this horrific-sounding emergency. Dr. Hoium made it appear as if this was just an ordinary visit and not a big thing. Shove the uterus back in and both the vet and the cow went on their way in less than thirty minutes.

His description of pulling a calf out with a rope brought back memories of performing this feat in the middle of the night.

I enjoyed the stories of Dr. Hoium’s travelling companion Stan. Stan would sit on the truck seat, his feet on the floor and his chin on the dash. There he would sleep, or just watch the scenery go whizzing by. Oh, Stan was a full-sized Golden Doodle.

As I read this book I could not help thinking about when Dr. Hoium slept. It seemed that he would work a full day at the clinic and then be on the road in the evenings aiding his farming clients in their animal problems. This tired me out just reading about his nightly excursions.

I enjoyed this book immensely, the stories, the animals, and the many human characters that this vet dealt with.

When I read the book, I could not help but think of my grandfather who rarely had a vet to the farm. He always seemed to manage his animal husbandry and healing himself. Lack of money was the number one reason in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s when he farmed.

I will always remember Grandpa castrating piglets with a jackknife. I would hold the animal with its legs spread, Grandpa would quickly make two quick cuts, then squeeze and spit. Spit you say? Well, Grandpa was Indigenous, and he usually had a chew of tobacco in his mouth. He would spit on the wound from his jackknife laying a well-aimed squirt of tobacco juice there. Tobacco was one of the four main medicines of Native society and Grandpa used it extensively as a healing agent on the farm.

Don’t They Kick When You Do That? is a great read. If you have ever experienced farm life, you will enjoy this fast-paced read. If you have never experienced farm life, be prepared to be educated.

Gary Hoium was born and raised in the small community of Midale, in southeastern Saskatchewan, located midway between Weyburn and Estevan along Highway 39. He pursued a hockey career but turned to mixed-animal veterinary practice when a future as a professional hockey player didn’t turn out. He purchased a clinic in Weyburn in 1989, renaming it Hoium Veterinary Services. He sold it in 2004 and remained as a contracted/ commissioned employee, performing much of the clinic’s live cattle exports to the USA until retiring in 2021. He resides in Weyburn with his wife, Shelley, and enjoys spending time with their two adult children and spouses, and their five grandchildren.

Publisher ‏ : ‎ DriverWorks Ink (Aug. 12 2023)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Perfect Paperback ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1927570816
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1927570814