A beautifully honest narrative, not of arriving, but of becoming … A truly worthwhile read.
Why I’m Here by Jill Frayne is a compelling story about two damaged souls finding a way to endure. This story reflects life, and in life there rarely are neatly packaged endings. This novel is a beautifully honest narrative, not of arriving, but of becoming.
The action begins without preamble, when fifteen-year-old Gale arrives in a counselor’s office in Whitehorse following a series of severe panic attacks. Gale has been relocated to Whitehorse to live with her birth father and his wife when her mother’s escalating abuse back home in Cobalt, Ontario, prompts her stepfather to urge this move. The specific abuse reveals the mother’s own brokenness, and its impact on Gale is only beginning to surface. Gale’s primary concern, however, is the safety and well-being of her younger half-sister, who is still in Cobalt.
Helen, the counselor, brings her own issues to her interactions with Gale. Many years ago, she too moved to the Yukon from Ontario, but unlike Gale, she chose to come and to remain, even after her own sister died suddenly in an accident during one of her visits. Powerless to help her sister at the time, Helen struggles to reach Gale, and at times her personal feelings override her professional judgment. The author paces the revelations in both lives, not in a predictable pattern, but with abrupt shifts that hold the attention.
This is not a simple story in which a counselor breaks through to damaged youth and both are healed. It is instead a story of choices and unexpected alliances, of finding a path through the complexities of life. The decisions Gale makes are not predictable and perhaps they are at times unwise, but they are the ones that she commits to. We do not know how, or even if, Gale will finally arrive, but we can admire her as she journeys.
The Yukon setting is very well presented — the depths of cold in winter, the light and darkness of the seasons, the long slow way up Two Mile Hill, the personalities that are drawn to this land. Also, the sense of Cobalt’s history and unique topography stands out.
The characters are exceptional. The author reveals Helen’s inner tension and struggle gradually, and we grow in our understanding, seeing her flaws, but also her strengths. Gale evokes our empathy but also our concern; she is fractured, she is hopeful, she is real. She does things that real people do, not always making good choices, perhaps, but demonstrating an underlying nobility of spirit. Mindy, Gale’s mother, is a complex character whom we learn about through Gale’s recollections, her second husband’s observations, and the critique offered by Gale’s stepmother Sandy. Mindy’s darkness is shocking, and yet in the end, the reader is moved to empathy, not condemnation. Sandy herself is angry and opinionated, but ultimately, we see her bewilderment concerning her own past that fuels this. Even minor characters like Keith, a tough youth with his own dreams, are not minor, for they stay with us. The author portrays all characters in their flawed and forgivable humanity.
I found I needed time to settle into the author’s style, working at first to manage the timeline and the many characters, but then the story took over, and I was drawn fully into the characters’ lives, into their struggles and their aspirations. I feel like I have met them, and I am sure that I will never forget them. A truly worthwhile read.
Jill Frayne worked for many years as a family counsellor in Toronto and Central Ontario. Following a solo journey to Canada’s West Coast and Yukon Territory, her GG-nominated travel memoir, Starting Out in the Afternoon, was published by Random House. Since then, her outdoor adventure articles have appeared in several Canadian publications: The Walrus, Explore Magazine, Up Here, Canadian Geographic, to name a few. She divides her time between a maple woods in Central Ontario and the mountains around Atlin, BC. Why I’m Here is her first novel.
Publisher: NeWest Press (May 1, 2022)
Paperback 8″ x 6″ | 280 pages
ISBN: 9781774390498
