I made notes about this book as I worked my way through it. Today, as I’m re-reading what I jotted down, I’m thoroughly enjoying revisiting this journey with Gillian. I must admit that I blissfully forgot about some of the bleaker moments, but as I gazed back over my notes one thing that really popped out to me was that this book was a beautiful rollercoaster of emotions. It starts off with an incredibly deep and vulnerable prologue that immediately had me wanting more. Throughout the book, Gillian brings forth the notion that we, as humans, try to seek control and predictability because it makes us feel comfortable. She explains that while we all feel uneasy with life’s uncertainties, we often fail to recognize that most others feel the same way. In turn, people feel lonely and misunderstood by others when ironically, we all feel the same.
In order to properly process an experience, we compare it to something that has happened to us in the past. But what if we haven’t ever experienced something like the event that is currently taking place? Pandemonium. Chaos. We, as human beings, struggle to accept and process that which we are unprepared for. Gillian highlights that this day and age is only making this process more difficult for us. Technology is dulling our ability to adapt. No longer do we need to prepare a route to drive to our soirée, nor do we need to guess on how to dress, or who’s going to be there. Everything we would need to know is always available ahead of time, in the palm of our hands. It allows us to believe in certainty, whilst dulling our ability to adapt.
Deacon then discusses how as humans we are hard wired to have a cognitive bias towards negative information. She notes that despite a Harvard professor stating we are living in the most peaceful time on Earth, few people would believe it. We continue to assert that Square A is darker, even after being told it’s the same as Square B. Our social media feeds, and our lives, are bombarded with negativity at all times. Our attention bias is slowly (or perhaps quickly) dragging us to the depths.
Once we feel as though we have hit the bottom, full of questions and unease, Gillian begins to bring us back up. She may finally be getting some answers to this mystery illness that has taken so much away from her for so long. We learn that although worrying is uncomfortable, it’s motivating. Worry sparks action and change. As annoying as the nurse is that’s causing you pain, they remind you that being able to feel pain means you’re alive. We learn that having empty chambers in our body gives us the ability to float. The traumas and struggles that we endure, create a stronger shell for us to live in.
This book is a well researched guidebook to navigating today’s society. Gillian beautifully interlaces current issues facing the modern world with her journey of accepting her diagnosis. She reminds us that even in difficult times it is important to slow down and listen to what each moment is teaching you.
GILLIAN DEACON is an award-winning broadcaster and writer. A familiar voice on CBC Radio, Gill spent over a decade as host of Here & Now, Toronto’s afternoon drive show on CBC Radio One. She is the author of the national bestsellers There’s Lead in Your Lipstick: Toxins in Everyday Bodycare and How to Avoid Them; Green for Life; and the memoir Naked Imperfection. Gill lives in Toronto with her husband and their three sons.
Publisher: House of Anansi Press (Jan 27, 2026)
Paperback 5.5″ x 8.5″ | 240 pages
ISBN: 9781487013783
Hello! My name is Cassie. I have a BSc in Neuroscience as well as a BA in Psychology. I spent my years in university writing everything from essays to scientific journal articles about G-protein coupled estrogen receptors in the hippocampus of mice (riveting, I know). That little experiment got me published though! Now, I am currently pursuing a Creative Writing Certificate. Additionally, I went to college for Paramedicine which is what I spend my days doing now. I love reading and writing as a creative outlet to escape from my day to day job.
